You may have read that title and thought “oh goodness, what is she going to ask us to do now?” And that’s because you know me too well little lovies! LoL
I love challenges.
My children are really great teachers! My youngest has latched on to a cartoon show where there are three children that have super powers. Each episode they’re faced with some dilemma where they’re challenged to see that the only way to conquer the situation is to learn to accept help, give help, etc. when appropriate and their tagline after each lesson is my title for today:
“It’s time to be a hero!”
Once they have the epiphany they go on to win whatever battle they were fighting while also passing the lesson to their foe.
As I was watching it for the hundredth time (it’s only one season of about 4 episodes, so we’ve watched it at least 5 times already) I started to think how true that is for us too.
For the month of November my girlfriend Tamika Michelle and I have decided to focus Talk Back Thursday* (our twice monthly girlfriend conference call) on Mommy Meltdown’s. Last week for my Whirlwind Wednesday (on my Facebook) I shared about ways to avoid a mommy meltdown.
One way I gave was for you to redefine what it meant to be Super Mom.
Well today I want to broaden the conversation and talk to you about being a Super Woman.
Tamika and I agree that women everywhere are conditioned to do it ALL. Be an ever present friend. A selfless mom. Doting wife. A model employee/employer. An active church member. And still have hair, makeup, and style to die for with an AMAZING body. And always have a smile and kind word.
Don’t you just LOVE all those women that manage to do every single one of these things at ALL times…………….No, you don’t love them; because they don’t exist!
Women, it’s time to stop buying into the lie that we need to be all things at all times to all people, SOLO.
“It’s time to be a hero!”
Think of all the super heroes you can. Did any of them do their job alone? Even if they didn’t have partners they had tools right? Thor had his hammer (I bet it’s called something fancier than that), Batman had Robin, Green Lantern had his ring, etc.
Being a Super Woman DOESN’T mean you go it alone. It means that you use your tools. And since I know none of you have Batmobiles in your driveway that means your tools are probably people within your community. So, I have a challenge for you this week.
- Identify & UTILIZE your community
Who is in your community that is a tool or resource that can contribute to your success?
The father to your children, your parents, your siblings, friends, cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents etc. These are all examples of people that can be a part of your community.
And I bet they’re willing to help! Let someone pick your kids up once a week from school and spend time helping them with homework while you take that long overdue nap. Have dinner with a friend’s family once a week and get out of the cooking and cleaning that night. Let a co-worker handle that escalated call while you grab some fresh air!
It doesn’t have to be huge things. Lots of small contributions from your community are helpful too!
Some of you will say that the people in your community don’t pull their weight. My advice is to GET CREATIVE!
My last corporate job as a supervisor I had a team of supervisors I worked with. Six of us were on payroll but only two of us earned our salaried paycheck every two weeks. So one day I had a COMPLETE meltdown. I’d JUST gotten into the office and was checking on the agents. And the complaints came flying. Mostly from agents NOT on my team who had adopted me as their supervisor because their actual reporting sups weren’t doing their jobs. I tried to be empathetic. I tried to soothe them and tell them I got it, because I DID! But then I just couldn’t and I burst out crying. I said, “I can’t do this!” And I walked off the production floor. I realized I was trying to be “SUPER SUPERVISOR” *Dun Duna DUN* and I wasn’t being reasonable with myself.
There’s a reason I only had 18 agents assigned to me and not 65.
So, I had to get creative. I had a few really standout agents that I started pulling and having sit with agents to coach through calls while I tended to the MANY other things that needed to be resolved for the agents. This is an example where the appointed community wasn’t pulling their weight so I expanded my community.
Don’t be afraid to expand and grow your community. Pull on those you may have not considered before to do things as well. Just because they’re only a friend from church doesn’t mean they wouldn’t love to have your kids come over once a week for playdates with their children while you go get a pedicure!
Some of you will say that you don’t have a community. CREATE ONE! Start building relationships and pouring into the ones you already have now. You’ll never have help if you don’t actively seek it out!
- Set time aside to just be YOU
Superman was Clark Kent too.
Of course the Xmen were ALWAYS the Xmen but they were also mutants…so…..think about that! LoL
I have to set aside time weekly to just be Christina. Not Christina Xlimit, not mommy, not a wife, not the tutor, not the classroom volunteer, JUST ME!
It usually consists of a chai tea latte and great book. It isn’t a LONG amount of time but it’s whatever amount I need in order to feel centered, quieted, and stilled.
Daily even; I get up at 4a to work before my children wake for school. I spend that time cuddled in a blanket on my couch with my laptop, gospel music, and prayer. And even though I’m working through the process it’s a time daily where I just get to be quiet.
In a house of 4 children and 2 adults quiet is appreciated IMMENSLY!
This is my time, daily, to meditate on the things that burden my heart (this is the time that I pray for you all as well!) and to prepare ME to be SUPER throughout my day.
Give yourself permission to have these moments. They are essential to your SUPER!
“It’s Time to be a Hero!”
Being a Super Hero is as much about being wise as it is about having strength.
Be wise enough to know that sometimes (maybe most times) your OWN strength just isn’t enough to get the job done at its best! Be willing to use your community, to create one if necessary, and to give yourself permission to take off your cape and JUST BE YOU.
Because, let’s be honest, being you is ALREADY super!
Believing for your limitless lives!
*If you’d like to join us for a LIVE Talk Back Thursday Conference Call find us on Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/groups/talkbackthursday/ We’d love to have you join our community!*